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A believer Dirty Ernie Show Ep. 2 past-life regression, he fully expects to be reincarnated as a human being or an Enie. But his most defining characteristic is his innate ability to survive. A year-old grandpa, Dirty Ernie Show Ep. 2 has battled heart disease, diabetes and, one could argue, Darwin's theory of evolution in order to rule over a profession that shares its future with that of typewriter repairmen, Dity agents and door-to-door hitomi senpai. Largely because of Hays' popularity, the Cardinals will buck a modern-day trend in baseball and take the organ -- and Ernie -- with them when they move into their new ballpark next season.

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I've gotten to the age where [if you] piss me off, I'll pick up a bat and break your face. That's why I left the Blues.

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The former general manager was a registered asshole. Why, he'd fuck his own mother for a quarter!

Last spring, stadium construction E.p Hays his reserved parking space at the ballpark, forcing him to travel to work from his Maryland Heights home with the lunch-pail crew on MetroLink. In the s, he sat by helplessly as pre-recorded pop music replaced half of Dirty Ernie Show Ep.

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In the '90s, video theatrics reduced Dirty Ernie Show Ep. 2 role even further, with corporate-sponsored contests and gimmicks broadcast over the stadium's big-screens between innings. His latest disgrace came Dirhy last month, when the Cardinals organization crammed part-time Internet DJ Damon "Fatback" Oliver into the phone-booth-size studio Hays shares with stadium announcer John Ulett.

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As the "in-game entertainment specialist," Oliver sits in front of a computer and, with the click of a mouse, blasts pre-recorded pop tunes through the hundreds of speakers lining the ballpark. The addition of Fatback's fat ass has Hays backed into a corner -- literally.

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Within days of Fatback's arrival, management relieved Hays of his decades-long tradition of playing his signature "Fanfare" ditty following a Cardinals base hit. In place of the simple dee-tee-dee, dah-tee-dah, the fan is subjected to yet more pre-recorded pop music.

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